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My friend Andy Opie wrote the following post on Facebook on Good Friday:
"The time between…do we ever think about how upsetting the time between Friday and Sunday must have been for those who loved Jesus must have been. They did not know it was only about waiting a few hours for something to happen. They thought it was over. Have we ever reacted to God this way? #BlackFriday"
It reminded me of my struggle with depression. The first time I struggled with depression, the song "Enough" by Chris Tomlin was a popular worship song in church. I would sing the chorus and feel so lost.
All of You is more than enough for all of me
For every thirst and every need
You satisfy me with Your love
And all I have in You is more than enough
I remember crying out to God and asking where He was... I could not feel Him and singing that He was "more than enough" felt so false. In the midst of the darkness, it is hard to know that the light will come again. The disciples did not know that Jesus would be resurrected on Sunday. They did not know that they were just in a state of waiting.
In the midst of depression, it can feel like there will never be joy again, like the night will never end. I remember feeling so overwhelmed, so lost. I remember thinking it was not worth it to keep going. I did not know that there would be light and life and joy again. I just wanted to the pain to end.
I want you to know that the night will end. The darkness will fade away. There is help and hope. Do not give up. Even when it feels like God is not "enough," when it feels like He is not there for you, He is right there with you in the darkness. Though you cannot see Him or feel Him, He has not left your side.
"Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for You are with me; Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me." Psalm 23:4
